Gold Dust Gertie

Today, random article gave me this little gem, Gold Dust Gertie, which was an "all-talking musical comedy" from 1931. Now, apparently, it was originally produced as a full-on musical, but there was a "backlash" against musicals back in '31, so they made it into a regular movie. Now, I don't know about you guys, but doesn't that seem like a horrible, horrible idea? Think about some musicals you know. Then think about what vapid junk they'd have left if they took out all the music & dancing.

• Grease: Bad accents, teen pregnancy, incompetent hurdling and a slutty black outfit. No thanks.
• High School Musical: Pretty high school boys playing basketball in a natural, un-choregraphed way. Unless one of those boys is also a werewolf, I want nothing to do with this movie.*
• West Side Story: Romeo & Juliet. Okay, bad example.

So, it seems that all this movie had after they took out the music was a couple of dudes in matching suits and a tiny pony. And let's be honest, I'd probably watch it just for the mini pony. Sadly, I checked out the trailer, and there's absolutely no pony to be found. WTF? Guess Gold Dust Gertie really was nothing after they pandered to the musical backlash.

At least they all talk in my favorite dialect: old timey. Say, put on some records and let's smoke us some Chesterfields, say? I heard that Gertie'll knock your bridgework out. No foolin'.

*See, if you take out the musical part of HSM, you take out half the plot, and all that's left is the basketball part. Kinda like when you take all the dialogue out of The Hills. Smart!